NICE PEOPLE CAN’T BE TRUSTED!
“Wait, what? Holding doors open and helping old ladies across the street doesn’t make me untrustworthy!” You’re right it doesn’t, but neither does it make you nice. It makes you a kind person. There is a big difference between nice and kind. Today let’s explore these differences and how there is no place for “nice” in our lives, as we continue our discussion on Satya or Truthfulness.
Like the KIND Bar boasts ” It’s nice to remove artificial ingredients, but kind never had to.”
What’s wrong with being nice? Well, like the slogan suggests, nice is artificial whereas kind is real. The innate difference between nice and kind is that at the root of niceness are feelings of inadequacy and the need for approval or validation from others. Nice lacks honesty. Nice is an illusion. It is a false image imposed by what we think others want to see. Nice lies to your face because it’s afraid of you. Nice hides the truth in fancy little boxes only letting you see what it wants you to.
Kindness, on the other hand, is a commitment to honesty without harming others and stems from a place of benevolence and love. Kindness comes from our unique essence and speaks to the moment from a center of truth. Kindness asks us to live from a place where there is nothing to defend and nothing to hide.
The practice of Satya (truthfulness) and Ahimsa (non-violence) naturally culminate in kindness. There is no need for “nice” when you have kindness. Honesty to ourselves and to others while resolving to do no harm provides us with the basic framework for building happy, competent and meaningful lives. Trust in the truth, do no harm and the rest will fall in place.